What should have happend to dipper on his way to the multi-bear
by The Cowardly Christian
Summary: A Dipper V.S. Manliness AU! Dipper ends up in an awkward situation on his way to the multi-bear. (continued in 'Tales of the Falls')
1. Chapter 1

What should've happened to dipper on his way to the multi-bear

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

Dipper jumped down from the tree's! Only a couple more miles! Then he'd slay

the multi-bear! His trials would be complete! Then truly he would be a man!

Let nothing stop him! "Uh, dipper?" Asked a confused, familiar voice. Dipper

looked around and saw Wendy. "What are you doing?...Actually forget that,

what are you wearing?" Asked Wendy feeling more awkward by the second. It's

at that point dipper very became self-conscious of wearing nothing but a

loincloth in front of the girl he liked. Embarrassed, he covered himself.

"Oh...Uh-Stan! Yeah! Stan made me do this! It's...a new promotion for the

shack!" "Oh...okay then." Said a very uncomfortable Wendy...there was only

so much you could say when your friend was standing almost-naked in front of

you. A couple more awkward pauses elapsed before dipper cleared his throat.

"Right, so I should get going. See you later!" Shouted dipper as he ran behind the nearest tree-

**RIP!**

It was the mother of all awkward silences. Dipper had made it behind the tree,

his loincloth had not. It was snagged on a bush near the tree. After several

long, painful minutes of silence. A very flustered Wendy spoke up. "Should I

just leave?" "I'd appreciate it." said a mortified dipper from behind the tree.

…...

A couple minutes latter. Dipper was back on the move, and he was pissed!

…...

The multi-bear was getting a very bad feeling...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

**AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't. **

**But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?**

**SERIOUSLY, Why aren't their more dipper V.S. Manliness AU's that involve Wendy? Could someone explain it to me?**

**Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

**Love me, flame me, review me**


	2. Chapter 2

What should've happened to Dipper on the way to the Multi-bear. Chapter 2

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

**ATTENTION EVERYONE! I'll be briefly breaking my Hiatus and having a Halloween contest. I'll be posting Halloween themed stories, horror themed, or one's that end with a cliff-hanger! The story that gets the most reviews, will be the one I update on Halloween!(and maybe a few other surprises. heh. heh.) **

**And don't forget to check out my new "Shake Up the Falls" Challenge!**

…...

Dipper Pines whistled happily, despite being covered in blood. He had the multi-bears head on his pike. _Just need to present this to the guys...and then I'll be a man! _Thinks Dipper excitedly.

He walks to the man-cave...and hears the Minotaur talking. "I can't wait for destructor to return! Then the party can begin!"

Dipper smiles, he opens his mouth to announce himself- "YEAH! That'll teach that fruity bear to like girly music!" Mocks another Minotaur

Dippers eyes widen. "Wait, what?" He listens for more...and is horrified!

_I...it was because he liked 'Disco Girls'...they made me murder someone just because of his taste in music!?_ Exclaimed Dipper to himself horrified.

He looks up to the Multi-Bear's head...it no longer appeared to him as a trophy...but instead as the head of an innocent soul..forever screaming 'WHY' to his murderer.

Dipper threw it away and ran down the hill, tears hot down his face.

_I-I murdered someone!? And for what? To be a 'MAN'...what is wrong with me!?_

**klack**

Suddenly Dipper stubbed his toe, causing him to trip and tumble the rest of the way-

**rip**

Dipper groaned as he lifted his bruised body up...as well as notice that he was naked. Dipper flustered as he began to head back up the hill to search for his loincloth- Then he stoped. _You know what...no. Clothing is for someone civilized...not a monster like me...in fact-_

Dipper takes a huge breath, then exclaims: HEY WORLD! COME TAKE A LOOK! SEE THE PROOF THAT I'M NOT A MAN! I'M BARELY A BOY! NOPE, I'M JUST a SELFISH, IMMATURE, MURDERER WITH FREAKISHLY TINY GENITALS!"

And with that, Dipper sets off to wander the woods naked...for many days...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

**AN: this is a one time exception for my contest because of the cliffhanger; everything else will be one chapter long. To be fair, i'll only count the reviews since I've updated it.  
**

**AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't. **

**But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?**

**Love me, flame me, review me**


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